Monthly Archives: April 2015

The Missing Easter, lost faith.

As with all holidays, there is always going to be that obvious missing little girl. 
Easter is absolutely no different. 
Although we don’t do piles and piles of Easter Eggs, there is still one missing. 
Easter always being scarred by the plans that should have been in 2012. 
In 2012 Easter landed on my eldest’s birthday, we were going to do visit Melody in hospital, Pizza Hut for a birthday lunch, another quick visit to Melody, then home to hunt for Easter eggs and eat chocolate…..
But it wasn’t we managed a birthday party for normality, although our normality was ruined by a member of the family, making our grief into theirs. We desperately didn’t want to cry or be sad for my eldest, it was her day….but there is always one that had to make it about them. 
The day was suppose to be so, so different. 
Easter Bank Holiday will now always be remembered as counting down the days until we had to say goodbye, a funeral for a baby. 
Counting the days away from when we last saw our girl alive. 
Walking in to the Church to prepare ourselves for the day, an Easter Garden (It looked a lot like Makka Pakka’s Garden).
Having to hear stories of Jesus resurrected, an adult, 
where our poor, poor baby never had a chance to have one life. 
“God needed another Angel” Why mine? No second chance on a life she had barely begun. 
Shine Bright Like A Diamond. 
Baby Girl
Unless you have truly walked in a bereaved parents’ shoes,
these thoughts will never be understood