#MayWeAllHeal…Day Twenty-Six – Signs

Day Twenty-Six
Signs
I’ve already briefly mentioned that I don’t really do signs, I did slightly in the beginning.
In the belief she had gone to a better place etc, but as time has gone on, there is no better place than with us. And I don’t really have signs from her. 
Especially when others say they feel her and she is their guardian angel etc. 
She’s not.
In the beginning saw the weather as a sign, throughout her life we had early spring.
Glorious Sunshine. I was wearing vest tops an flip flops all through March. 
Which is very unheard of. 
The morning of her funeral it was lovely weather, we were able to o a balloon release
we were able to have a dry internment.
As soon as we arrived at the wake venue, it rained heavily.
It stopped when we were making our way home, but carried on for weeks and weeks afterwards.
Five months after her death I began counselling with CRUSE bereavement service.
It was one on one home visit, each week a feather would float by the window as if Melody was listening in. 
But in reality, although I would love so dearly to believe it, I knew really it was a bunch of seagulls that used to like staying on our roof. 
I hope maybe one day I will learn some signs from her. 
But I think of it this way, as my way of coping. 
And I can’t force these feelings. 

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