#CaptureYourGrief Day Two

When we married in 2011, it was our intention to have a baby together, as I’d already had two children and he his daughter who was born sleeping, years before we were together. 
Together we’d had early miscarriages, but knew once we were married we’d try for a baby. 
Our intention was to have a honeymoon baby, an apparent rainbow baby.
We just wanted a baby together. 
My intention was never this…
Fast forward to 2015, Three Years Six months One Day into the death of our baby, my intention is simple..
To never let anyone on this path feel alone. To not walk away when things get boring or tougher. 
I have tried to honour her memory before, with charity work or community groups.. only ending up feeling more alone when the support fails to show. 
It is hurtful and embarrassing. 
My intention is to now try and not let these failings bother me in keeping our daughter’s memory alive, but to cherish the people who have walked beside me, even people who weren’t around initially, are now squeezing my hands with no signs of letting go. 
In honour of Melody Caitlyn I will continue to carry her with me. 
Remain standing for her and her siblings.
Wasn’t sure on what sort of photo to put for today’s.
This one apt, as in the beginning our intention was to change policies for eye procedures. 
Eye procedure has (apparently) been looked into. Her eyes are looking sore here, but still looks so beautiful…but of course I would say that.

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