Tag Archives: towards tomorrow together

Charity Awareness – PAIL Awareness

charity towards tomorrow logo

Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Week

This week remembers and spreads awareness about the babies and children who have passed away. I have always been open and honest about my grief journey; my thoughts after Melody died. I don’t really need this single week to do so; however it gets people thinking, it gets people talking, it brings the taboo to the forefront of people’s minds. In the hope that one day the taboo will be a distant memory. We have a long way to go.

When we walked out of the hospital after Melody had died; it became apparent form very early on that the support as a whole for bereaved parents really is few and far between; even more so with Melody’s death. Leaflets, awareness, even charities concentrated on a few scenarios; which of course is amazing, the more awareness the more chances women and professionals will be able to reduce the rate of death. But it can leave parents like us feel alone, pushed out and even more isolated.

Charity

From the first few days I took to online support; but knew I wanted to help more; there’s so much more I want to do. I decided that I would like to try and get a group together. It was something I felt was missing. I ended up contacting Mel Scott of Towards Tomorrow Together, a charity who supports families who have lost a baby through miscarriage, stillbirth, babies with poor prognosis in utero and they included us. So essentially all losses, nobody gets excluded.

Little Daffodils was born; although it was originally named Melody’s Voices I came away from a prestigious baby loss event in 2016 – The Butterfly Awards and knew that giving support and making a difference was so much more than doing something in her name, and in her memory. Daffodils are the flowers for us who represent Melody but they give so much colour, but only live for a short time. I really want to make a difference; sometimes it can feel like I am hitting a brick wall; others when people message for support and then say thank you, I know something must be doing.

Towards Tomorrow Together provide Butterfly Boxes to hospitals to help families create memories in the short time after a baby or child has died. Unfortunately it isn’t something we personally received (back to the lack of support), but they do bring comfort to families who have to leave without their beloved children.

 

little daffodils logo

Education

Through the death of her own baby, Mel has worked tirelessly to raise awareness, put together educational sessions – I have even spoken at one; and in the midst of putting one together myself, with the help of Mel.

It is difficult to get across to professionals the real thoughts and emotions behind losing a baby; through textbooks there should be a time limit. There isn’t.

This Somerset run charity works a lot from fundraising, this year Little Daffodils as a team has made £1900 with various fundraisers.

There is so much more to do within the baby loss community, especially for infant loss awareness; it will take more than a week out of a year to achieve it, but we do need to keep talking, keep listening most importantly to not let any parents – Mums and Dads feel alone and unsupported. Their – our babies mattered.

She wasn’t “just” a baby. She is ours; she was here for five weeks. She is Melody.

 

Julz.

 

Melody’s Voices

To Make A Difference part two.

A little while a go,I mentioned about the baby loss face to face group I was working on.
The launch happened last night, Tuesday 3rd May. Once again unfortunately the attendance wasn’t huge,but I’ve come to realise this isn’t a reflection on me. I will push through this. Although attendance wasn’t huge,it was a fantastic evening. With new support I certainly was not expecting.
With full backing of health visitors,the local midwife,undertakers and now our town mayor,it has made me feel incredibly positive, that this will be a step forward in the right direction.
Opportunity to have an event or two.

mel and julz
(I hate my photo being taken!)

Group

Personally I think people assume that a group of this nature will be full of tears and sadness. Breaking down.
But it won’t be like this,of course there will be tears, having such losses are hardly a walk in the park.
But I’d like to enable people a safe place,where they can rant about their loss,not be met with judgement.
I’ve been to a non loss related group, the moment you’re picked out from the crowd,for not doing as the expected, belittled in front of strangers,almost forced to tell these strangers your biggest fears.

For Melody’s voices, I’d like people to feel welcomed, but not pressured to share their story. Come sit quietly,listen. Open up if and when you’re ready.
Come and talk about our crazy weather. Or listen to things you may relate to.
For me I know my conversations aren’t the same as someone who has never lost.

I really am excited for the future of this group,to be able help someone.

We’ve now a date for an event in October,we’re not sure what the event will be just yet, currently putting a committee team together.

Next group is Tuesday 7th June 1930.
We have tea and cake.

Thank you for reading and to those of you who continually support us.
Xx