22nd March 2012 – Day 25
Wearing her 3lb vest, it was still far too big for her.
She was after all still only 2lb.
She was having a duvet day that day, she remained in her incubator. We were able to perform her cares an give her a feed. Her tube pulling became less and less too, as they had moved her feeding tube from mouth to nose. She wasn’t keen in it in her mouth, but was still far too small for NG. However her feistyness meant that the nurses had to find a way to get the tube through her nose – and keep it there.
Although small, and born super early, premature babies can really teach you a lot. They are incredibly clever, as with normal babies they know their own minds. With Melody she was able to teach us how little and how much she wanted to be touched, she was able to tell us when she had, had enough of being pulled about.
The most obvious of her hand gestures was to place an open palm in front of her face; that was to tell us, she wanted to rest.
Melody really did know her own mind; along with doing the opposite to what we had been told to expect; she was feisty and nicknamed little Miss Fidgety Pants. Kicking the Doctor during her birth, hitting the cardiologist when he dared place gel on her tiny chest. she’d cry when it wasn’t expected; pull up to 12 feeding tubes a day.
She really was something else. They may be small but they really are perfect preemies.
21st March 2012
We wanted to catch a ward round, so we made our way in early. It always kind of felt to me that it was like a parents’ evening – progress; only it wasn’t teachers it as healthcare professionals. Today was the day we were told that our micro preemie would be coming home.
15th May or thereabouts,
“Make plans as a family of 5 for Whitsun week” We were told.
They told us there was a possibility she’d come home on some home oxygen.
But because she was such a feisty bum, she’d have come off the oxygen the day before discharge. Her daily brain scans had shown no abnormalities including no cerebral palsy, and her PDA had corrected itself. We really were on course.
She was coming home, this was the day we had been handed hope – the biggest celebration since her birth. It was something for us to focus on, for her siblings to look forward to. Their eyes flew wide open with excitement when we told them.
March was almost over; soon we’d hit April then it would only be a month until we’d leave the hospital, it really wasn’t long.
Sitting holding her, being told this news only made her feel more like ours, more like I was her Mum, just a few weeks until we had her to ourselves.
She’d pulled her umpteenth tube out today too, she was declared a bad influence.
She was certainly making up for her size.
A huge personality.
She’s coming home.
20th March 2012
That bliss, that we had been given hope. It was hard to find hope, but we were given it.
We had walked into to be greeted with the news, that I could have Kangaroo Care…which is – Skin to skin cuddles.
It wasn’t the first time I’d had a cuddle but was the first skin to skin.
Beneficial to both mum and baby, mum of course for bonding and milk production.
But for baby can be medicinal, our daughter’s observations stabilised, she was relaxed and appeared stress-free.
In some undeveloped countries, they use this technique as medicine alone. Places often sit mums down on a chair, somewhere comfortable and just let them cuddle their babies; providing them with food and drink. Skin to skin is also great for Dads too – sadly Melody’s Dad didn’t get the skin to skin.
As you can see it was incredibly emotional. I was never really allowed more than 5-10 minutes at a time for cuddles; it felt so difficult to place her back inside her little box. I remember that desperate feeling of needing those important newborn snuggles, to spend hours just sitting and cuddling, smelling her head. But each time it was always too soon. It was always so wonderful.
She looks so tiny here, she hadn’t quite hit 2lb. But her delicate ways meant that she felt like two tonnes, not 2lb!!